definition of bad faith

From the chapter on “How to Be an Ignorant Jerk”

I don’t know if there’s really a book titled How to Be Rude, but if there were, the Devil would speak in bloody red letters, the Conscience would speak in small print, and the book would say something like this:

Bad Faith Negotiation Tactics:

A catalog of the most-used, and yet least-often-mentioned negotiating tactics. Try these if you’d like to have a reputation as a weasel or a scoundrel:

• Hope They Forgot: When writing a contract, leave the other side’s requirements out of the written contract, in hopes they either won’t notice or that they will be too sheepish to correct you or too timid to speak up or too inexperienced to know how to complain. {You’re reading “Definition of Bad Faith” by J. E. Brown.}
• Try Snottiness as a First Resort. Go for the jugular. A popular tactic among purchasing agents. If you can rattle your opponent, maybe he won’t make as many demands.
• Play Good Cop, Bad Cop: After reaching an agreement with the other party, turn the contract negotiation over to your purchasing agent with instructions to play hardball and get you the terms you really wanted. {Read this comp1ete article at http://jebrown.us/Relationshop/Definitions/bad_faith.html .}

  Also known as “breaking your word even before the contract is signed” or “having your purchaser get you out of this agreement”.

  Also known as “failing to mention that your purchasing department is the only office with any power to negotiate agreements”.

  Also known as “Surprise! I was only pretending I would agree to your terms. Now you’ll have to explain and negotiate the whole agreement from scratch when you talk to our purchaser.”

• Pretend There’s a Rule: Respond to your opponent’s required terms and conditions with “I can’t put that in the contract.” In other words, pretend it’s prohibited when the truth is you just don’t know how to word it or you’re afraid to ask your supervisor for help or permission.
• Pretend There’s a Law: “We can’t do that, it’s illegal.” Curiously, this tactic is most often used by low-level employees who know nothing about their corporate policies nor the law. The full translation would be “I’m afraid to do that, or I don’t think I can get permission; therefore I’m going to snow you with scare tactics to make you drop your request.” {Read this comp1ete article at http://jebrown.us/Relationshop/Definitions/bad_faith.html .}
• The Fake Apology: An apology is a promise to change one’s behavior. In a Fake Apology, someone issues a verbal apology but has no intention to change behaviors — as soon becomes apparent when he or she repeats the offending behavior.
• Shaming the Opponent using a parental tone of voice, to see if you can get his kindergarten reflexes to kick in. If you can get your opponent to kowtow to your apparent authority, he’ll surely give you what you want. Unless, of course, he gives you a dirty look and ends the meeting.
• Ask for Second Helpings: After agreeing to a compromise, come back next week demanding the other half of what you wanted. Repeat this week after week to wear your opponent down.

  “Compromise” of course means “getting half of what you want”. Compromise is a good thing! So when meeting with your subordinates, compromise as often as you can. This means get half of what you want on the first meeting. At the second meeting, use a little arm-twisting to get half of what you didn’t get the first time. At the third meeting, strong-arm a few more concessions for yourself. Now you have seven eighths of the whole pie, but you haven’t left your opponent feeling that he has nothing. Continue to “compromise” in this way until you have all of your concessions back.

  Also known as “Alzheimer’s Compromise” or “forgetting that we had a deal”. {Read this comp1ete article at http://jebrown.us/Relationshop/Definitions/bad_faith.html .}

  Also known as “not honoring the original agreement”.

  Also known as “getting the other party to make all the concessions”.

  Also known as “Give and Take Back”.

  If you get called on your behavior, and if you really want to show some nerve and some snot, defend yourself with “That’s because *I* know how to compromise.”

• Play Dumb. Pretend not to understand the other party’s needs and requirements, even when he explains them to you in minute detail. If the other party is sufficiently inexperienced or eager to get along with you, he’ll drop his demands.

  If someone tries this on you, fight fire with fire. “I don’t understand” can often be countered with “Well, I explained it well; so I really don’t see any reason why you shouldn’t understand what I just said. Can you explain which part you didn’t understand?”

• Refer to Fantasy Agreements: “I thought we agreed that ____. (scowl)” This is a favorite tactic of persons who have power over you. They imagine that they can name the most outrageous requirements, and that your stunned silent reaction constitutes consent.
• Dominance Behaviors: Any attempt to use scary displays of power in an attempt to make the other party back down or agree to all your terms.
• Silent Disagreement: Neglect to mention that you don’t agree to the other party’s terms or rules or requests or needs; neglect to mention that you don’t meet the requirements. Simply silently fail to comply, and wait and see if the other party notices. Commonly seen in job hunting, house hunting, and contract negotiations.

  Examples: Non-monogamists in the dating pool, who “forget” to mention up front that they don’t share your belief in monogamy.

If you’re new to negotiation, be on the lookout for unethical persons who use the above tactics. Whenever you make an agreement or write a contract, be sure that your requirements are included and respected.

— J. E. Brown