After an abuser attacks his or her chosen target or victim, the abuser will often launch a second-wave attack which consists of criticizing the victim’s reaction to the earlier abuse. Abusers often criticize the stunned silence of their victims by snarling, “There you go again! You pout about every little thing I say.”
Synonyms:
Shock; stunned silence; withdrawing.
feeling sorry for oneself, self-pity, pity party, silent treatment; sulking, whining, withholding, and other terms used by abusers who need to be made single.
Related Concepts:
abusiveness, adding insult to injury (by criticizing the reaction to criticism); attempting to dictate and micromanage the emotions and reactions of others; blame shifting; dysfunction; accusing someone of being emotionally unstable; gaslighting; hurt feelings; kitchen sinking; learned helplessness; needing more space; nit-picking; sadness; spin; verbal abuse; victim blaming.
